Well, we made it through another week friends and frenemies, well done! I’ll admit this week was a stressfest here at TI, both personally and professionally. I am looking forward to catching up with the bottle of Sutter Home I neglected all week and just doing whatever I wanna do, GOSH it’s cool now. It’s Friday so we can all just turn up out computer speakers at work and pump Bone Thugs. Which brings us to our Friday THROWDOWN jam of the day, Bone Thugs “Crossroads”. The year was 1995, the setting, Ocean Edge Resort and Gulf Club in Cape Cod, the ride, my aunt’s 1992 Ford Taurus station wagon, the track of choice was CROSSROADS.
My cousin Joey had the Bone Thugs single and we would drive through this gorgeous resort PUMPING Bone Thugs. I can only imagine how disturbing it must have been for families walking to the pool to see a bunch of little white kids being driven around by their aunt with all the windows down singing lyrics like, “Bury me by my grand-grand and when you can, come follow me”.
So without further-ado I give you your Friday Throwdown jam, Bone Thugs N Harmony, CROSSROADS.
The lyrics of the song speak to everything that a white upper middle class kid goes through before age 12, gang related violence in the inner city. The video starts off in a setting I know all too well, a Catholic Church. What was up with the 1992-1997 concept of just putting guys in variations of similar outfits and having them stand in a row and sing? Sunglasses are NOT optional?
Through out the video different people are murdered which is signified by NEO from the Matrix walking up and turning their eyes black. So basically True Blood ripped off this ENTIRE concept in season 2. They are also apparently just killed by vanishing, it’s basically the plot line to Ghost Dad.
You can die in a multide of ways when you roll with the Bone Thugs, like trying to jump a chain link fence. Or by playing an innocent game of cards in your suburban neighborhood, RIP UNCLE GEORGE.
I remember this one really disturbed me, what had Uncle George done? You know this was like some old school stuff that came back to haunt Uncle George that he had done in his youth. I think that’s where they got the concept for that episode of Soprano’s where Tony and Meadow go to visit colleges and Tony runs into that guy from a million years ago that ratted him out to the Feds and kills him. Payback is a bitch.
Or how about when the just kill a baby in a hospital while the parents watch. Was that necessary? What kind of hospital is this that a baby who is clearly not in the neonatal intensive care unit is just dropping dead, and furthermore what kind of hospital has actual cradles?
I fully understand that Uncle George had to be off-ed in the drive by shooting but is really necessary to take out some seemingly lovely couples newborn baby? Way to go Bone Thugs. Then he takes the baby to some fucked up version of where the evil guy in the Smurfs lived.
Gargamel can make his favorite soup using a Smurf, orrrr a baby brought to him by Bone Thugs N Harmony. That sounds about right.
But yet in death there is new life, because your friend lives on. For example they might come back as Olmec from Legends of the Hidden Temple.
Or how about that baby of the nice couple in the maternity ward? Well apparantly Gargamel didn’t get to her, because he’s being held by this nice angel and watching a dope sunset.
The fact of the matter is we all die, drive by shootings, Tony Soprano, natural causes in infancy. But we can all meet up again at the Crossroads, and you won’t be lonely, I mean you’ll have Uncle George, some poor couple’s baby, andddd Bill Cosby in Ghostdad.